Before you read this poem, it will be best for you to have read the essay first. In doing this it will enable you to make sense of the poem fully. Thank you.
A messenger from Heaven above
To speak of the descent of love
Was sent to a virgin most pure
Foretold in prophetic scripture.
Was this event, as Gabriel
Stooped down to Mary, there to tell
Her of forthcoming motherhood
Of Jesus, holy Son of God.
Meekly did Mary bow her head
Consenting to what had been said
From purity of heart exclaimed
That she would magnify His name.
The time for her to give birth to
Emmanuel, to make anew
Lost humankind, now may we say
O most highly favoured lady.
O gloria, O gloria
Salvation is now come to us
O gloria, O gloria
The Saviour ever glorious
Is born the morning of Christmas
We exclaim "Deo Gratias"
And to His mother we do hail
And thank God that love will prevail.
A young Catholic teenage girl
Fostered into the family
To give some comfort to her world
Settled into ours happily.
Conscious was she that we were not
Of her faith, on Sunday with care
To Mass would go, it mattered not
If her faith climbed a different stair.
Now all things nuptial crossed my path
The family invited to
A wedding, whereby solemn oaths
Were made, to tie the knot into
The lives of happy bride and groom
A beautiful, colourful scene
And afterward, plenty of room
For celebration, one did glean.
Seven years in a wilderness
A spiritually barren place
A desert pathway, nothing less
Where one saw not the Saviour's face.
Yet this was part of plan divine
To reach rock bottom, then to find
The Saviour's love in bread and wine
Now I could see, who once was blind.
With restoration came a new
Pathway to prayer, charismata
In meetings to look forward to
One might expect outcomes greater
Or lesser, though it mattered not
They all fitted each circumstance
The Saviour's presence was the lot
Of all assembled, lives enhanced.
Spiritual immaturity
And hasty, undiscerning mind
Caused me, without real clarity
To want to leave my church behind
And switch to Rome, coloured by my
Fellowship with the Catholics
Who ran the prayer group most ably
But was a box that was not ticked!
A major change that did take place
Was a change in musical taste
Music of beauty, love and grace
Of Anton Bruckner, true repast
Of Catholic musicality
Symphonies, masses and motets
To bring one sweet felicity
And finest musical banquets.
Another venture into prayer
And after having moved back home
Once more of charismatic fare
Again this road to gladly roam.
Gifts of the Spirit, freely given
To edify and sanctify
Yet my attendance now was driven
To other paths, I know not why.
Two further matrimonial
Events took place, both Catholic
Beautiful ceremonial
And joy unbound, so ecstatic.
Yet during celebrations of
The later wedding, I had time
To think if there was any love
In my marriage, real or just mime?
My own misgivings on all things
Catholic were enhanced by a book
That a friend borrowed, wanting wings
To fly to Rome, and yet he took
The volume, an antithesis
Against the Catholic faith as such
The Tiber was not crossed as this
Volume persuaded him as much.
Anglo-Catholicism was
The order of the day that time
A sacramental life to cause
A different outlook, there to chime
Changes to narrowmindedness
From all things evangelical
To benediction and the mass
A newness theological.
Considering ordination
Led me to read in loftier heights
Theological summation
By Aquinas, by which the rites
Of Eucharist are based, whereby
Substantial changes come to pass
In consecration, how or why
Is God's prerogative at mass.
I was startled at what I read
From the angelic doctor's hand
This was pure truth that I was fed
A holy, green and pleasant land.
No other theological
Outlook can even dare to match
This pure, harmonious madrigal
Here may we listen, pray and watch.
Seeking a way from liberal
Theology within the church
From theory implausible
Once again, I began a search
To find where truth uncompromised
Would be found, wholesome, good and pure
A church where truth was mobilised
The message of salvation sure.
Things now began to settle down
At least, that seemed to be the case
It seemed that good seed had been sewn
In a holy, worshipful place.
My thoughts of finding somewhere still
A place away from my own home
To read, reflect and have my fill
Of peace to let my mind then roam.
I set my heart to call upon
St. Mary Magdalen's church in
The heart of Brighton, whereupon
I set forth to set foot within
That place of which in former times
I had set foot, this time to find
The building closed, confusion chimes
Yet help was at hand, good and kind.
I was allowed admittance to
The building by two volunteers
On hearing of my tale of woe
Enabling me to calm my fears
And settle down to read and be
At peace within myself and find
Within that sacred space to see
Pure truth and beauty calm my mind.
Serious thoughts did now occur
Whether the Catholic Church should be
My sacred home for evermore
Upon this earth, now time for me
To discern the right path to take
Whether to stay or take my leave
And start afresh, staying awake
Discerning which voice to believe.
Pentecost twenty twenty-five
Saw me attend the Roman Mass
With wondering did I arrive
What in that day might come to pass
The elevation of the Host
Called me to whisper Jesus' name
In worship, emotions almost
O'erflowed, yet love was set aflame.
Real Presence brought me to that place
Of worship which had stirred my heart
Real Presence makes one see the face
Of Jesus, who to us imparts
Real Love, that was truly present
In radiant, holy beauty
Real Love, it was no accident
The Lord was there for all to see.
This dual Sunday ritual
Occurred most Sundays for a while
One may say that this was God's call
To walk with Him many a mile.
The journey continued apace
With honesty I now relate
My disbelief, not hard to trace
Of the new Anglican Primate.
The news made me decide this was
The time for me to leave for good
The Church of England, not to pause
But take the bold step which now would
Make a discernment pathway plain
A pathway to follow in truth
And honesty, bearing no stain
Of falsehood, heresy, untruth.
Farewells made, I now set upon
A path without the Eucharist
A real test, I was not alone
For fellow travellers in our midst
Were sharing this experience
The bread and cup denied for now
But if it was right, one might sense
The homeward path, one knows not how.
The lack of Eucharist was joined
By faith formation, there to learn
And explore doctrine, tests conjoined
Yet welcome in weekly sojourn.
Rite of Election was a joy
And yet, to hear one's name read out
Described what words cannot employ
And felt surreal, there was no doubt.
Up to this point I felt within
A sense that this was the true path
To journey on and underpin
All I had learnt in the true faith.
So many friendships swiftly made
Rich worship often led to tears
Of joy to wash away and fade
Any confusion, doubts and fears.
Reception and Confirmation
At Easter Vigil was the time
To come home, O what elation
Awaited me, what bells might chime
In Heaven's portals for me and
All those who made the journey home
To the true church, O happy band
Of pilgrims, we say "Come Lord, come!"
And finally, Easter Sunday
At Mass, so happy and so bright
The sun let in its golden rays
That made the whole church dance with light.
So many hugs, and cards and gifts
That came my way, I thank you all,
May we, our holy hands uplift
And praise God, who is all in all.
If you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. (Romans 10 v9 NIV)
